Random Thoughts

Give Me A Break

I’m tired.

Today I am really tired. I feel like the very marrow in my bones has been sucked dry. I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels like this some days. Given what we’re all going though, it’s surprising that we don’t all get up every morning feeling this way. No one would blame us for saying so, either.

It’s getting tough. Tough on us all. And it only takes one thing on a particular day and we just collapse like a deflated balloon.

Well, today, I feel like this. Exhausted. The proverbial straw on the camels back?

Learning from my sister-in-law that my nephew—who only passed his exams this summer—is working with difficult kinds between ages 11 to 23 in a group home. A home that has cold zones (supposedly safe from COVID) and HOT zones. Those housing young adults infected with COVID.

He only started three weeks ago, and only told his mum, Val, last Monday about the COVID section because … he had to go for a COVID test! It was negative but still, he went into self isolation. He tested again today and has shown no sign of COVID, so we await to see if all is well.

This on top of the fact my sister-in-law can ill afford to be exposed and has, like me, because of an underlying condition, been all but housebound for the last 250 days! She has a heart condition and takes medication to stay alive as she refuses (at age 45) to go under the surgeon’s knife when told she had a 50-50 chance of the op going well, or having further complications.

And then, wham. The Kid says, I came in contact with a COVID patient!

What can you do? What can you say? I’m confident the kid will be okay, he’s young, he’s fit, and has shown no symptoms. But Val? What if he is/was asymptomatic? Even if he stayed for all intents and purposes in his own room with just trips to the bathroom. It’s difficult.

The family has been wrecked with worry. A few more days, and we’ll know if he get’s the all clear but still. He will going back to work, and this could all happen again minutes after doing another shift.

Everyone has taken every precaution. Have done what we’re told. Have done all we can to stay safe, and keep others safe. And yet. There are no guarantees. None.

One kid who doesn’t know what’s going on, acting out because he’s being kept in isolation, pulls off a member of staff’s mask, and it can be all over. It’s heartbreaking for everyone involved. And exhausting.

I think I’m running on an empty battery.

We hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. What else can we do? There are no easy answers.

So, please, wherever you are, with all my heart, stay safe.


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