Category: Random Thoughts

I think it goes without saying that a lot of us, daughters that is, have complicated relationships with their mothers. I know I did. It wasn’t without problems, flaws, and a great deal of misunderstandings on both our parts, that resulted in a very long love hate relationship that never really resolved itself till much later in life for both of us.

It would not be a lie to say I think my mother loved me best between the ages of, oh, being born and probably up to the age of about 6 or 7 years of age. That time when I was a small, pretty, blond child with a happy sunshine personality. A perfect little girl she could put a pretty dress on and take everywhere with her, and people commented and complimented.

From there on in, the change started, and because of what happened, our relationship also changed and was never the same from that moment on. So that, by the time I hit puberty I was a plump, sulky, withdrawn child who hide away from everyone and everything and lived my life hidden between the pages of books. Day dreaming of escape.

Escape from my mother, my family, and my life.

At this point, my mother was entering menopause as I entered my teenage years and, well, let me say this, the two were a combustable combination. Nuclear fission had nothing on us. Two deadly nuclei coming into close proximity that sparked, and then, exploded with the force of 10,000 suns!

During this time anyone comparing me to my mother with an, ‘oh, don’t you look like your mum!’ was treading dangerous ground.  

As it was, at 17, when leaving school with a dream to go onto higher education—I wanted a degree. My mother said to me, I either had to get a job and pay rent if I wanted to stay at home, or, the implication being, leave. 

Four months later, I left home.

It took years before we finally found a place amicable enough to talk to one another. And then, a handful more before I was old enough to finally let go and move on, at least, with my life. And even though we were talking at the end, before I finally moved continents again, she never really fully understood. There was just too much hurt and pain between us for the rift to heal completely. 

And yet, despite all that, even now, some 20 years after her passing, I have fond memories of a woman who was so many things, including the most important, being my mother. 

The lens of time has been kind and now, during this weird time, I find myself able to say…

Mum, I miss you and I love you. 

THE LAST ROLO DILEMMA.

Today’s dilemma is a little less dramatic or exciting as yesterday’s and for that, I am thankful. For the last 3-4 weeks, like many, we have been trying to source certain items. For most people it seems to be they cannot find toilet paper. We’re okay on that count and have, by my reckoning—due to my partner’s incessant need to buy online—enough to last us well into the summer. But what we cannot find is, toothbrushes.

Yep. We had a pack of 4 and now? We only have 1 left, and I think the mice have been stealing them and selling them online, or, my partner uses a new brush far more quickly than I do. I can’t decide which it is. Either way, we’ve been looking and then, a Walmart here, in QC, had them for sale online. So, along with a bunch of other stuff we were hopeful of getting, ordered 2 four packs in anticipation.

Well, the Walmart order arrived with most of what we ordered … except the toothbrushes!

ZIP! NIL! NADA! NOTHING!

Really? I mean, come on people, who is hoarding the damn toothbrushes?

Look, I’m willing to trade you TWO TOILET rolls per toothbrush, any NEW, serviceable toothbrush. Please!

Any takers? What, four toilet rolls? Damn, you people drive a hard bargain.

But seriously, if anyone, anywhere, knows where I can lay hands on a damn toothbrush without having to pay an extra $10 PP in order to get it, let me know. We’re getting desperate here.

Meanwhile, must Google what people did to clean their teeth before the introduction of said implement.

Stay safe and try to enjoy Easter as best you can everyone, and remember, Skype and Facetime are way safer than inviting people over to celebrate and share COVID-19 with their chocolate eggs.

Love,
Alex